


Muse

by lilostylins0n



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Art School, Fluff and Angst, Genderqueer, Genderqueer Character, M/M, Pining, tw transphobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-07
Updated: 2016-05-05
Packaged: 2018-04-30 09:51:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 18,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5159315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilostylins0n/pseuds/lilostylins0n
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You’re my muse, Luke. You always have been, from the moment I saw you.”<br/>“I’m not that spectacular.”<br/>“You might think that... But I dont.”</p><p>Or the art school au where Michael’s a struggling photograher, Ashton’s a writer who’s just chillin, Calum’s a thriving painter, and Luke, who’s non-binary and designs clothes, is about to become Michael’s whole new world…</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> HIIIII! :D if you're reading this, you're awesome. & thank you. i hope you all enjoy reading this as much as i did writing it!

The first time Michael saw Luke, they were both quite drunk. It was a decent sized frat party, everyone drinking to celebrate the fact that the mid-term tests were over and they could all finally go home for a break. 

Michael was on his fourth drink, not even sure what it was anymore, chatting with Calum in a corner where the music wasn't too loud. Calum was going on about how he wish he worked harder on his painting he turned in for the mid-term and how he hoped he'd get a good grade.

Michael didn't know Calum all that well; just from passes in the halls and small chats at a few other parties. He did know, however, that Calum was one of the best painters in the school. Despite the fact that there were hundreds of painting students (it was an art school, after all) Calum always outdid everyone.

"I'm s-sure yours will be the best," Michael spoke, words beginning to slur as he gulped down the last bit of harsh alcohol out of the solo cup. 

Calum simply shrugged, "What did you turn in?"

"Bullshit," Michael snorted, "Probably failed. I've had absolutely no inspiration lately." Michael sighed at himself, setting his now empty cup down on a bookshelf that was towering beside them. Thinking about his mid-term only made him want to drink more; he was so disappointed in himself.

Michael was a photographer, and a pretty damn good one at that. He was so good at putting his feelings or thoughts into his work. He took blurry photos of the outside world when he felt lost, or made a repetitive photoset of something, or someone, whenever he couldn't get whatever it was off of his mind. It wasn't always just your typical cutesy pictures of trees, or friends, with him. He usually wanted to tell a story.

But lately, despite feeling lost, the blurry pictures wasn't what he felt was right. His mind was continuously racing and honestly, he was feeling like everything he was doing was too normal or predictable. He needed something new, but wasn't able to find it, yet. 

"Can I introduce you to one of my friends?" Calum asked.

Half confused because he was intoxicated, and half confused because of the abrupt change of subject, Michael agreed with a shrug of the shoulders and a nod. He began to follow Calum around the crowd of people that were squished into some guys tiny, off campus apartment. Finally, they spotted someone sitting alone on a loveseat.

"Hey, Lukey!" 

The blonde looked around with a puzzled expression, until that turned into a smile when he realized it was Calum that called his name. He immediately hopped up off his seat, and nearly tackled Calum with a hug.

"Calummmm," The taller boy sang, "I haven't seen you in days."

"It's only been a few hours!" Calum laughed, "There's someone I want you to meet." 

Calum pulled out of the hug, gesturing to Michael and introducing the two, "Michael, this is my roommate, Luke. Lukey, this is Michael."

Luke reached out to politely shake Michael's hand, but Michael was too distracted to even notice. He was fixated on Luke's pretty face, adorned with winged eyeliner, sparkly silver eye shadow that brought out the blue in his eyes, and possibly a light pink blush.

Michael finally realized Luke's extended arm, and shook his hand, when he admired the boys outfit; the black pleather skirt hung just above his knees, matched with pale pink tights, and a simple, tight floral printed top. 

"Niceeee t'meet you," Luke slurred with a smile. 

"You... You too." Maybe it was the drinks consumed, or the fact that Luke was just that absolutely beautiful, but Michael felt breathless. He couldn't help himself; he was a hopeless romantic and anytime he met someone beautiful- male, female, or anyone in between- he got hooked quickly. 

Calum began to explain, "I wanted to introduce you guys, because-" but was cut off by a voice yelling behind them.

"I don't know how, but it's impossible to find any more alcohol in this place! Ridiculous!"

Michael recognized the voice immediately, and when his vision stopped blurring he saw the curly haired man approaching them. Michael and Ashton met at the beginning of the school year whenever Ashton finally arrived at school, two days later than he was supposed to.

"No more drinks?! Are you serious!?" Luke groaned, "Ughhhh."

Calum's voice filled with concern, and he asked, "How many drinks have you had, Luke?"

"However many Ashton brought me," Luke replied with a laugh, raising his nearly empty red cup.

Calum's eyes widened and he glared at the older boy. 

Ashton muttered, "I dunno, I think maybe four?"

"Fuck."

Calum knew how Luke got when he was too drunk. And he knew how many drinks was enough. Calum was protective of Luke, not exactly like a parent, but he watched out for him, and took care of him when needed. They'd been best friends, even before college, and Calum was always Luke's rock. 

"One, two, three, four, too many drinks, Lukey's on the flooooor!" It was almost like it was in slow motion, the way Luke fell to his ass as he sang and giggled. Michael was chuckling, too, partly out of confusion, but also because Luke was acting hilarious.

"Luke's a lightweight," Calum mumbled in Michael's ear, then reaching down to grab Luke's hand and pull him back to his feet. Luke staggers as Calum announces to the guys, "I think I've gotta get Lukey here home."

Luke continued to laugh as he hooked his arm around Calum's waist, waving goodbye as they walked off, the last words heard from him being, "Thank you and goodnight."


	2. One

The sound of Ashton's alarm clock blaring across the room was enough to wake Michael up- when he didn't need to be, at 8 o'clock on a Monday morning- but somehow, Ashton still slept through it. 

Michael groaned as he blinked his eyes open, and when he rolled over in bed, noticing Ashton still curled up under his blankets, Michael threw a pillow at him and hollered, "Ash, wake up!"

It took Ashton a moment before he simply groaned, mumbled incoherently and then finally hitting the snooze button.

"What time did you get back last night?" Michael asked with a yawn, as he watched Ashton sit up, rub his eyes and run a hand through his mess of tangled curls. 

"Two A.M."

"That sucks. Why so late?"

Ashton frowned, "I didn't want to leave my family."

_You're not the only one,_ Michael thought. It actually took a bit of convincing from Michael's parents to make him go back to school. He didn't want to leave them- he was their only child, he worried about them getting lonely, and he was extremely close with them. He simply loved and missed them too much.

But also, partly because Michael was anxious about this next semester. Throughout the time Michael was home for the break from school, the subject of school and his grades kept coming up. And yeah, his grades were fine for the most part... Until he looked at that mid-term grade and started beating himself up.

It wasn't the worst, but Michael kept insisting that he could've done better, and that he only did as well as he did because the teacher liked him. Now, Michael was demanding that he needed to work harder and get better grades for this term. 

"Don't you have class in an hour?" Ashton questioned when he realized Michael was still in bed. Ashton was rummaging through his things attempting to find something to wear, after pulling his hair into a bun and putting on his glasses.

Michael shook his head, clutching his blanket tighter, "I don't have any Monday classes this term."

"Lucky."

"Yeah," Michael sighed, "But I should probably take my camera and go out and about." Michael didn't know exactly what kind of assignments he would have this term, but he did know he needed to find some new ideas and inspiration quick. So, he figured he could practice. Go around and take some shots of stuff and hopefully find something that would fill the void in his aesthetic. 

**

The loud banging on the door startled Luke, who was stood in front of the mirror, attempting to get his eyeliner just perfect. And it was almost right until he heard the pounding, and hollers of, "Luke! Luke, open the door!" Now, it's smeared under his eye, and he's groaning loudly.

"Luke, if you don't open this door in three seconds-"

Luke stomped to the door, smirking as he swung it open, to let Calum- who forgot his key, again- inside. "Sorry, mom," Luke joked, returning to the mirror to reapply his liquid liner for the third time.

"Your face looks fine, Lukey," Calum commented with a sigh as he sat down on Luke's bed, and dropped the boxes of cereal bars, "Now come eat these, you didn't beg me to go to the cafeteria for nothing." 

Luke glanced at the clock, as he wiped the mess off his face, and explained, "I don't have time to eat with you this morning, Cal, I'm sorry. My marketing class got moved to the other side of campus and I've got to leave in like, five minutes."

Luke finished the touch ups to his face, quickly ran his fingers through his flat fringe and then proceeded to examine his outfit intensely. Luke always had to make sure he looked good enough to feel comfortable in his skin.

It’s no surprise really that Luke is a bit insecure. Growing up, being raised with two older, straight and jockey brothers, was the first and main cause of Luke’s self consciousness. He was never taught about feminine things, it was always "Luke's going to grow up and play football and be a real ladies man, just like Jack and Ben." But in reality, Luke came out the complete and total opposite. 

Around the age of fifteen, Luke started to realize who he was. All of his friends were girls, besides Calum, and he was gravitating towards the things they liked. Make up, dresses and skirts, and most of all- boys. 

It was scary to Luke, to know that he wasn't like his brothers, or his best guy friend. He remembers so distinctly the way he came out to Calum, saying, "I don't like the things that you like." Luke began to cry after blurting that sentence, and then explained that not only did he have crushes on guys, and not only did he sometimes want to dress up and look pretty, like a typical girl, but also, that Luke felt like there was no gender he could truly identify with.

Luke is non-binary, or more specifically agender, and prefers the pronouns ze and zir. 

Calum was extremely accepting, and held Luke as ze cried, saying that everything was fine. Calum even admitted to preparing himself for that moment. He took a guess Lukey was a little different whenever he would point out hot girls, and Luke would just shrug, or try to force zirself to agree with an "I guess."

Luke's family, on the other hand, was a little different. Despite their support by saying "we love you no matter what," Luke couldn't help but feel out of place, mostly because of zir brothers saying, "this will take some time to get used to," or their questions of "why?" and "are you sure?"

Yes, Luke was sure. Ze wasn't going to grow up and be the captain of the football team with girls hanging off each of zirs arms- Luke had zirs own dreams and aspirations to make zirself happy.

Finally, with a flash of a smile to the mirror, Luke accepted zir looks. Ze then grabbed two cereal bars from the box, slung zir bag over zir shoulder and proceeded to head out the door, with a wave to Calum, promising, "I'll meet you for dinner at our usual!"

**

The cold New York air pierced Michael's face, as he tried to run for cover from the snowstorm that was approaching. Sure, Michael was a fan of winter in theory; sparkly white flakes covering trees and sitting by fireplaces with your loved ones. But, sometimes the cold was a little too much for him to actually handle. 

When he finally made it into the Starbucks, and felt the warmth, he smiled contently. Pushing the hood from his sweatshirt off of his head, he shook his galaxy colored hair, and stepped up to order a hot chocolate. 

Michael found a table by the window to set down his camera bag and after collecting his large cup, he got comfy in the chair. Taking slow sips of the hot liquid, Michael could feel his body temperature starting to normalize itself again. 

Michael sighed as he took out his camera, and began clicking through the many pictures that he took that day. He attempted to shoot black and white photographs of the school buildings, tried to capture the blue and greyish colors of the sky, and anything else he passed by that seemed interesting. However, looking at the pictures now, Michael didn't feel anything. And he wanted to feel something. 

After mindlessly scrolling through all the pictures multiple times, finishing his warm drink, and realizing it would be getting bad out soon, Michael decided it was time to head back to his dorm. But just as he packed away his things and was about to stand up, he noticed a semi-familiar face entering the shop.

Waves of memories from the last time Michael partied washed over him. He was tipsy, at the time, but he remembers meeting this person. Luke. He can't remember the details of  
Luke's outfit or makeup style, but Michael does recall thinking that Luke was almost breathtakingly beautiful.

It was like Michael was stuck sat in the chair. He couldn't get up or barely move, his eyes were glued to the tall, broad shouldered masterpiece who was standing, arms crossed,  
waiting for whatever drink ze ordered. 

Luke glanced at Michael whenever ze could feel eyes on zir. Ze thought ze recognized the face, and definitely the hair, but wasn't sure where from. Luke brushed it off, until ze got his coffee, and saw that the possible stranger was still ogling zir. 

Luke stuck zir straw in the to-go cup and took a sip, as ze approached the corner Michael was sitting in. "Do I know you?" Luke asks, and it might have come out a little more harsh than intended, but the boy was staring at zir, after all!

Michael finally blinked, clearing his throat nervously, "Uh, yeah, sorry. I'm Michael... Michael Clifford, I met you at that house party before winter break."

Luke tried to piece zir drunken memories together, "Ashton and Calum's friend, right?"

Michael nodded. 

"God I was so wasted that night," Luke added with a laugh, causing a small grin to form on Michael's face.

"Yeah," Was all Michael could choke out, as he eyed the blonde up and down, amazed by the style and beauty, yet again. Luke was wearing plain black leggings, with an oversized, purple colored ombre sweater. Zir pink bag matched perfectly with zir light make up, the only darkness being zir signature winged black eyeliner, that went along with zir chunky black combat boots. 

Too many different thoughts were racing through Michael's mind, and then he found himself reaching into his camera bag, beginning to ask, "Would you mind if I took a few-" 

"Shit!" Luke muttered, after finally checking zir phone that was buzzing almost non-stop, "I forgot, I'm meeting Cal for dinner. I'll see you around, yeah?" 

Michael didn't have time to respond, as Luke was already strutting off.


	3. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi sorry this took me for fucking ever to update lmao life is rough hbu
> 
> i hope yall like this/are liking this/whatever :))

The week passes quickly, and the only assignment Michael recieves is to recreate one of his favorite photographs. _Easy enough,_ Michael thought, but when he received his grade, and got a B, he started having a minor freak out again.

Michael was always on the edge of having an existential crisis, and school was almost always the reason why. Photography was something Michael has wanted to do since he was a teenager. His obsession started with high quality photos he saw online, but blossomed into being fascinated with meaningful photos. Famous pictures with stories behind them- things created for a purpose. He probably put too much thought into his hobby sometimes, but he really wanted to make it into a career, somehow, so that's when he decided he wanted to go to an artsy university in New York. 

Michael wasn't 100% sure what he could get out of taking two years of photography classes, but he knew it could help him somehow, so that's why he applied. He was ecstatic when he received his acceptance letter, along with all the instructions on housing and tuition. It finally felt like his dream was becoming more real.

Lately, though, Michael's been having some setbacks. Sure, he was trying to stay positive, and all he could do was his best, but it felt like there was a lot of pressure on him right now, only put there by himself. He knew that if he didn't succeed in being a photographer, he had other options. He was young. And if it didn't work out, it wasn't like his parents would be disappointed in him; they were always very supportive of Michael, in all aspects of his life. But, if Michael didn't complete at least one year of school, he knew he would be disappointed in himself. So, all he could really do was just keep trying. 

When classes were finally over on Friday, Michael was relieved when he could go back to his dorm. He entered the tiny space, not saying a word to Ashton and just plopping down face first on his bed with a groan.

The sounds of the keyboard clicking didn't stop as Ashton questioned his roommate, "You okay, buddy?"

"It's been a looong week," Michael exhales again.

Ashton chuckles as he continues to type and talk at the same time, "You need to get out tonight. Come with me."

Michael picks up his head so his voice isn't muffled by the pillows his face was sinking into, "Where the hell are you going?" 

It wasn't like Ashton to be going out on a Friday night, and Michael hearing about it last minute. Not even just because Ashton was usually just in their dorm, writing and doing assignments, but because he didn't have many friends on campus, and didn't like going out alone. Ashton loved going on "adventures" as he liked to call them, but most of the time they were with Michael, so it surprised Michael to hear that he had previously set plans. 

"An art show in the city. Some kid I've been talking to in my poetry class this week has a painting or something in it, and he invited me to go. Calum Hood."

"Calum's in your poetry class?" Michael asked, finally sitting up in a more comfortable position on his bed.

"Yeah, says it's just for fun though. Like a side interest," Ashton glanced at the time in the corner of his laptop, before saving his work, "If you're ready now, we could grab some dinner in the city and go from there."

Michael smiled, content with that idea, and hopped off of his bed, "Let's do it!"

**

It was not a surprise at all to Luke when ze found Calum pacing back and forth in their dorm, when Luke got back from shopping after classes. 

Luke sighed with a smile and set zirs bags down on the floor, stepping over to Calum, who was mumbling to himself, and grabbed him by the shoulders. "Cal. Calm down," Luke spoke slowly, staring into Calum's eyes, attempting to get him to think rationally.

"What if they hate it, Luke?" Calum started babbling his worries, "What if they think it's a mess or they think it's ugly or not good enough or-"

"Calum! That's the opposite of calming down!"

Calum paused, just staring at Luke before inhaling deeply, "The last time I was in an art show was back home, remember?"

"Those people didn't know shit, and you know that. The people here in New York are smart, so it's going to be obvious to them that you're bad ass at painting. Understand?"

Calum couldn't help but crack a smile and nod at Luke's words of encouragement. He really loved Luke, ze was always there for Calum just as much as Calum was there for zir. Even though many things about the pair were different, they were still each other's sidekick. 

Thankfully, Calum's nerves calmed down by the time they arrived at the big building in the city. He felt even better when the woman who helped him set up his huge painting claimed, "This is the best one I've seen so far tonight, you have major talent." That compliment also earned Calum an "I told you so," with a cheeky grin from Luke.

When people started crowding around, Calum stood far enough away from his painting so that people didn't know it was his, but also close enough to see their reactions. He watched as some people looked like they were falling in love with it, others looked pleased, and some looked slightly confused. Overall, Calum was happy with the reactions his painting received.

Calum only finally approached the space where his art stood when he noticed Ashton and Michael had arrived. He stepped up behind them, and asked, "What d'you guys think?"

Both Ashton and Michael turned around, smiles on their faces. "It's amazing, Calum," Ashton said.

"Genuinely proud of you, dude," Michael added. 

"Good!" Calum breathed a sigh of relief, "I was beyond nervous, couldn't have done it without Lukey."

Luke appeared from behind Calum with a smile on zir face, "Always bragging about me, aren't you, Cal?" Luke joked, and then politely spoke, "It's nice to see you two again."

Ashton's response of, "Likewise," Came out with no problem. Michael, on the other hand, was almost frozen up. Every goddamn time he came in contact with Luke, it was like his body stopped working. His brain was flooded with so many thoughts, he didn't know which to speak. It was like his eyes were taped open, as he studied Luke from head to toe. 

The most prominent thought in Michael's mind was, holy shit he's gorgeous.

Michael didn't know how he could be so infatuated with a person he didn't even know that well, but he was. Maybe it was because Luke was unique, and there was definitely something special about zir. Maybe it was simply because Michael found Luke to be really, really attractive. Or maybe it was just all of the above. Either way, Michael knew he was feeling something.

Michael didn't realize he hadn't given a response until he snapped out of his thoughts, and heard the end of the conversation going on around him.

"-is that okay with you, Mikey?" Ashton asked.

"Sorry, what did you say?"

The others laughed, making Michael blush slightly with embarrassment. 

"Ash and I are gonna go find some drinks for us," Calum explained this time, "You and Luke can stay here and people watch everyone ogle my painting, is that alright?"

"Oh! Yeah, yeah, that's fine," Michael said, but only becoming aware of what he agreed to when the two walked off, and he was left with the taller boy. 

Luke and Michael exchanged polite smiles, both staying awkwardly quiet. Michael's brain was trying to force him to say something- anything; he just wanted to make conversation. 

After a few minutes of the silence, Michael finally blurted, "Are you an artist, too?"

"Aren't we all?" Luke laughed, because according to their university, all students were doing some form of art. There were many different areas in the school they attended; whether that be painting, or writing, or photography- there were even students who were dancers and actors. It was a broad horizon of things. "I go to school for clothing design," Luke explained, "And I take business and marketing classes, in hopes to run my own boutique someday."

Astonished. Michael was utterly astonished, and impressed. "That's awesome," Michael complimented. 

Luke's teeth and tongue messed around with zirs lip ring- a nervous habit ze had, as ze nodded. "You're photography, right?"

Michael's smile grew, surprised Luke knew that fact, "Yep," Michael paused, contemplating his next few words, "Actually... Would you mind if I got a few pictures of you?"

"Ummm," Luke's face scrunched up, taken aback by the question, and honestly trying to decide if ze felt like this was a good idea. 

Michael immediately felt guilty for asking such a question, and started apologizing profusely, "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to be pushy, you don't have to, I'm so-"

"Michael," Luke laughed softly at the babbling boy, "It's fine. Go ahead."

Michael's face glowed with excitement, "Really?" He confirmed, fishing his phone from his pocket, because he didn't have his good camera with him.

Luke nodded, "Yeah, just... Neck down only, though, okay? No face in there," Ze felt awkward asking for specifics. 

Michael didn't question Luke's request, though at the back of his mind he was partly wondering why. He thought maybe it was because Luke wasn't wearing make up- and in fact, this was the least feminine Michael had ever seen zir look. 

Luke posed and Michael held up his phone, zooming in and angling everything perfectly before saying, "3, 2, 1... Beautiful."


	4. Three

_I think I'm in love,_ Michael texts to Ashton as he sits in his last class of the day on Tuesday. He was barely paying attention to the teacher explaining their assignment more in depth- he lost all focus as soon as he heard her say they were to do something on low quality pictures. When she said that, Michael immediately took out his phone, and scrolled to the photo he captured of Luke, days ago at the art show. It was perfect. Actually, Luke was perfect.

From: Ash   
Not again... With who now?

Michael rolled his eyes at the text message, but also felt himself blush and smile a bit as he typed back: Luke.

Ashton chuckled to himself when he read Michael's response- he loved when Michael "fell in love." It happened once every few months; Michael would pine over someone, maybe go on a few dates, and when things wouldn't work out, he would find someone new. Michael was a hopeless romantic- he longed for the feeling of love, and because he had the ability to be attracted to people of any gender, he had lots of opportunities to find someone new- whether they would love him back or not. 

To: Mike   
Cal's sitting next to me in class right now, want me to ask him for Luke's number? ;)

Michael's fingers hover over his keyboard, not knowing what to respond. The ball of nerves jumping around his stomach are screaming NO! No, don't, please! Luke would never like me, I'm not nearly as exciting and talented and rad as he is... 

However, the confident side of Michael takes over when Ashton sends another message saying, "let me know now, bc class is almost over." Michael simply types backs: yes please.

**

When Luke's phone rings as zir aggressively trying to sew a skirt together for what seems like the millionth time, ze can't help but answer it with an annoyed tone, "Hello?" Ze barks out with a sigh, throwing the fabric on the floor and shutting off the sewing machine.

Michael's eyes widen, and his breath catches in his throat as he tries to choke out a, "Hey," Surprised by the unpleasant vibe he's receiving from the other end.

"Sorry," Luke exhales again, "Who is this?"

"Oh, It's uh- It's Michael... Michael Clifford. I got your number from Calum- Well, technically from Ashton, who got it from Calum," Michael paused to laugh nervously and try to stop himself from spluttering on, "Cal didn't tell you he gave your number out?"

"Haven't talked to Calum much today, actually... Today's his busy day, so! He should be home soon, though."

"Oh, sorry."

"Not your fault," Luke giggled, and Michael could've sworn he felt his heart drop to his stomach at how fucking cute it sounded, "So how are you?"

"Oh I'm okay!" Michael answered honestly; he wasn't really good at the small talk thing, and wanted to get straight to the point... But, he was actually genuinely interested in hearing about Luke, "How's it goin' for you?"

Luke breathed out a stressed filled groan, eyeing all the fabric, pins, thread, and other sewing accessories that were scattered around zir floor and zir desk. "I have a really important assignment due on Thursday and it's only halfway done," Ze explained, reaching down to pick up the lilac fabric ze previously threw on the floor.

"Aw, man, that blows," Michael sympathized, but then figured this was his opportunity to ask, "I actually have an assignment due next Tuesday that I was hoping- if you're not too busy- you could, um, help me with?"

Luke's response would be an immediate yes, if it were a good day- ze loved helping people. Instead, ze had to take a minute to ponder, before questioning, "What exactly do you need help with?"

"Well," Michael began his explanation, "We have to do something with low quality photography... And I really like the picture I took of you the other day at the art show, so I was hoping I could do a small photoshoot of you." 

Luke's first response was, "Woah." Ze didn't expect something like that at all; out of all the things Michael could do with that assignment, he just wanted to take photos of Luke? It seemed crazy to Luke, but also really, really nice. Ze even started to think maybe something like that could help conquer zir insecurities. 

"That actually sounds great, Michael," Luke began to smile, "I'd love to."

"Great! Let me know whenever you're free, and, uh, I'll see you then."

**

It was Thursday afternoon when Luke finally had some free time. Ze was running on no sleep and ten cups off coffee, and after presenting zir project- that ze finally got done with around 6 am- and then having lunch with Calum, ze figured why not do some more running around?

Luke and Michael agreed on meeting at Starbucks, and Michael said he would drive them from there to where he wanted to take the pictures. Luke spent way too much time in the Starbucks bathroom re-doing zir make up, running zir hands along zir dress too smooth it out and combing zir fingers through zir hair to make sure zir fringe lay perfectly; ze just wanted to assure zirself that ze looked alright. 

When Luke finally walked out of the bathroom, ze greeted Michael with a smile, and Michael greeted zir with a warm coffee.

"Bless you," Luke smiles, grabbing the beverage and beginning to gulp nearly half of it down.

"Woah, slow down there, Lukey," Michael chuckles after sipping his hot chocolate, "I just figured I'd buy us some since it started to snow while you were in the bathroom and I didn't want us to be cold while we're taking pictures." 

Luke's attention turned to the windows, and ze groaned lightly when ze witnessed the small flakes falling. 

"Sorry," Michael apologized quickly, "I didn't know it was supposed to snow."

"Neither did I," Luke shrugged, "Guess thats just New York, though. So, are you ready?"

Michael smiled, happy that Luke was still all for this, even in the snow. "Yeah, let's do it!"

**

The drive to Michael's favorite location was fun filled. It started out with Luke attempting to find something good on the radio, then complaining the radio plays "mostly shitty music" and then plugging in zir phone.

Much to Michael's surprise, Luke had good music taste. Michael would never admit it now, but he assumed Luke's taste would be very top 40s. Not that Michael saw anything wrong with that- he could definitely jam out to the radio sometime, but he was glad to learn that Luke liked a lot of the same bands he did. The two actually ended up singing together at the top of their lungs and laughing and generally quickly having fun and being comfortable with each other. It was pleasant for each of them.

Michael drove them to a state park which was one of his favorite places he found when he moved to New York for school. And if he thought it looked fantastic in the summer, he thought it looked pretty damn amazing now. Despite the fact that the ground was dampened and it was a little too cold for his liking, the snow-covered trees glistened and overall, the scenery looked simply appealing. 

"So, really, all you have to do is pose," Michael explained after finding a spot in front of some trees he thought looked nice. He held up his phone, backing away from where Luke stood to capture the perfect angle. 

Luke was posing indefinitely, hand on zir hip before ze sighed. Ze had to remind Michael, "Remember, don't get my face in the picture, okay?"

Michael looked up from his phone, so he could stare directly at Luke, instead of just through the screen. Michael's eyes traced over zir body; ze had a full face of make up on- blush, eye shadow, eyeliner, light lipstick. Michael seen nothing wrong, but he didn't want to question it. 

"That's fine," Michael said, looking back at the screen on his phone, and then finally taking one picture. Michael quickly cropped Luke's head out of the shot, and began playing with filters to see which one would look best for the shoot. But as he scrolled and clicked through the different overlays for the picture, he realized what he was focused on   
wasn't even how the picture looked... It was Luke. 

Luke looked stunning, posed and looking tall and broad. The dress ze was wearing was formed to zir shape and Michael thought it matched perfectly with the personality Luke had begun to show Michael. Michael knew he was in too deep for Luke already.

Michael looked up from his phone with a sigh, and before he could even think about it, the words spewed from his mouth, "Luke, you're really beautiful."

Luke lit up; like full on, eyes gleaming, cheeks blushing, dimples appearing when ze began to giggle. 

"Sorry," Michael's head dropped, trying to hide the nervous expression on his face when he realized what he said, "I just- I mean- everything looks really good." Michael held up his phone again, focusing the camera to Luke and finally announcing, "Ready? 3, 2-" Click.

The small photoshoot went on for about a half hour; Michael would take pictures and Luke would make different poses, some serious and some trying to be silly. Michael would relocate them to different parts of the forest and Luke was asking questions and making conversation about Michael and his work.

After babbling on for a few minutes about his journeys with photography, Michael asked, "What got you into clothing design?"

Luke stopped at a rock that didn't have much snow on it, and leaned against it, crossing zir arms with a sigh. Ze could just give a short little explanation, without going into detail about everything, but after Michael's passionate talk about what he does and why he does it, Luke thought ze owed him more than that. Plus, Luke was getting comfortable with Michael; ze would consider them friends, and ze felt like this was something ze could share with Michael- all of it.

Luke exhaled again before starting zir story, "I started designing my own things when I was around sixteen... It was a little while after I came out as non-binary, I wanted to present more girly, but also sometimes with a touch of masculine, and I wasn't finding anything in stores that I liked... So I started making stuff and it just eventually became my passion," Michael's held was titled, and he wasn't breaking eye contact with Luke; he looked so intrigued, fascinated, and in awe. 

"The boutique I want to open, that I mentioned before," Luke continued, "I want it to be open to people of all genders, or people who are like me, and have no gender. I don't want to make clothes for boys or girls, I just want to make clothes for people that like expressing different types of styles."

And if Michael thought before that Luke couldn't get anymore interesting... He was wrong. Michael continued to nod as he took all of Luke's story in, a light smile gracing his face. "Luke, that's really extraordinary, actually. Like, that's so fucking cool! You're really rad."

Luke was blushing and giggling at Michael's compliments; ze really thought he was being too sweet, but it was nice to hear that someone sounded so proud about what ze wanted to do with zir life. 

Luke never really had that from people close to zir, besides Calum. Okay, sure, Luke's family could say that they were supportive all they wanted, but that wasn't exactly the truth.   
There were definitely times zir father would get too worked up and talk about the fact that "this wasn't the life I had planned for you" or when zir mother would constantly ask if ze thought ze was making the right choices, or, that one night with Luke's brother that ze constantly tries to repress the memory of...

After just a few more pictures, Luke and Michael return to the car and start their adventure back to campus, filled with some more chats. Luke explained zir pronouns to Michael, which Michael thought was "pretty bad ass", and then Michael opened up to Luke about some similar things, like his sexuality. 

It was nice for the both of them, but Michael felt himself getting more and more feelings for Luke as their time spent together went on. By the time they reached the building where Luke's dorm was to drop zir off, Michael couldn't stop himself. After hugging Luke, and thanking zir for helping with his assignment, he had to ask, "Would you wanna, uh- maybe go out, like on a date sometime?" His confident side was trying to peak through behind his nervous stutters and running his fingers through his hair.

Luke's eyes widen, shocked by the sudden question, "Oh- uhmm..." A date... A date? Luke hadn't been on an actual date in years, the last one ze went on being with zir first and only ever boyfriend. Dating was never really something that crossed Luke's mind a lot- everything was always put before it. And while ze thought, maybe somewhere deep down, there were feelings bubbling up for Michael... Ze just couldn't.

"I'm sorry, Michael," Luke sighed, and watching Michael's expression fall definitely hurt more than anything- even the way ze repeatedly stabs zir fingers with needles when ze's trying to sew. "Dating isn't for me, right now, but I'd really love it if we could stay friends."


	5. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!!! sorry for updating so slowly but i should have more time now so i hope that if you like this you keep up with it!! :D thanks for reading ily all!!

The feeling Michael had wasn't anger; you can't be angry at someone for making decisions that keep them happy when you respect them. And Michael respected Luke, so the feeling was more like... 'I like you, you don't like me back, and now it's one in the morning and I'm editing pictures of you for an assignment and I feel just plain empty.' 

Michael was sat at the desk on his laptop, clicking through different filters, putting the photos into a collage, anything he could think of to make it look perfect- despite all of his mixed feelings, he was still determined to get a good grade on this thing. 

Michael hadn't even looked up from his computer in a while, until Ashton slowly and silently unlocked the doom room door, and tip toed in, not expecting Michael to be awake. However, the curly haired boy chuckled when he saw Michael focused at the computer, as he kicked his shoes off, along with shrugging off his jacket. "What are you still doing up?"

"My assignment's due tomorrow," Michael said, resting a hand on his chin and not looking up. Michael was eyeing every single little detail, making sure he could be finished. 

"Where have you been?" 

"With Calum," Ashton replied nonchalantly, hovering behind Michael, and running a hand through his hair after taking his bun out, "So you did an assignment on Luke, huh?"

Michael didn't answer, but could feel himself blushing. Quickly, he hit save, breathed out a relief filled sigh, and closed the laptop. 

"I can see why you like him, he's a cute one," Ashton added while he was changing into more comfortable clothes. Michael simply nodded, stretching his stiff arms and shoulders, before getting up and making his way over to his bed. 

Michael fought with his thoughts back and forth about whether or not he should correct the pronouns Ashton used for Luke. Ashton didn't know about Luke's gender, and Michael wasn't sure if that was something he was allowed to share. After all, though, Ashton was Michael's best friend, and definitely not an asshole. So, Michael spoke up.

"Ze is cute... Luke is non-binary, and doesn't use he and him pronouns." 

Michael explained most of the things Luke had shared with him a few days previous, from zir gender, to zir dreams and aspirations, and the fact that the two had lots in common. Michael ended his explanation with a sigh of, "Ze's really extraordinary," Which left Ashton to just shake his head and smirk. 

"What?" Michael questioned Ashton's smug expression.

"All that... And you haven't asked zir out yet?"

Michael nervously cleared his throat, and began fixing the pillows on his bed to avoid eye contact with Ashton, who was sitting in his own bed across from Michael. "I did," Muttered Michael.

"So, when is it?"

"It's... not. Luke doesn't date, ze just wants to be friends." Michael tries to make it sound like it's not a big deal, because really, it's not. It's not the end of the world. However, that didn't mean it didn't hurt. Michael let out a sigh as he finally got settled in bed.

"I'm sorry, mate," Ashton sympathized. 

Michael shrugged it off with a quick reply of, "Goodnight." 

**

A week later, Michael got a good grade on an assignment of someone he had barely spoken to in a week. That definitely did not help the sinking feeling he got in his gut whenever he thought of Luke. After avoiding zir for a few days, Michael thought it would be awkward to talk to Luke- despite the fact that ze had called Michael multiple times, and that Michael really wanted to talk to zir. 

However, Michael just continued to try and block out his heavy feelings, and work on more assignments. It was Saturday afternoon when Michael wound up in a small park near campus. The assignment Michael was doing wasn't as serious as he was taking it; it was supposed to be photographs of nature, which was why he ended up in the park- to take pictures of the trees and other surroundings. But Michael found himself more fascinated on the nature of the people around him. There were couples with picnic baskets, sitting on blankets and children running around so carefree. 

And there was Michael, sitting on the grass, alone...

Until he heard the clicking sound of heels approaching him, and looked up to finally see Luke for the first time in a while. 

Luke was of course standing on the concrete- ze wouldn't dare ruin zir favorite wedges by smudging them up in the possibly muddy grass. Zir arms were folded, but not in a sassy way; ze was actually a smidge nervous. When Michael didn't speak up first, Luke mumbled out, "Hey."

"Hi," Michael responded, avoiding eye contact by fidgeting with his camera. 

"I've been trying to call you," Luke immediately called Michael out, and Michael froze as he felt all of his mixed feelings begin to rush. He didn't know what to do- deny that he   
was avoiding zir, own up and apologize, run... Were there any good options?

Michael sighed, setting his camera down next to him before finally making eye contact with Luke. Michael's cheeks flushed, slightly embarrassed as he sighed, "I'm sorry." 

Michael wanted to say he wasn't avoiding Luke, and that he was just busy, but he couldn't lie to zir. "I really wanted to call you back, I swear. I wanted to tell you that I finally got   
a perfect grade, and it was on the assignment I did of you!"

Despite Luke's slightly hurt feelings, ze couldn't help but smile at that; it really made zir feel important and wanted, which were feelings ze wasn't exactly familiar with. 

"I wanted to tell you about an assignment, too, actually," Luke spoke up again after a few moments of silence. Luke then glanced down at zir outfit and zir shoes, before   
mumbling incoherently, and finally joining Michael in the grass. "That one I was working on a few weeks ago? I did great on it! My teacher offered to help me set up a small online business- something like Etsy, I guess, so I said yes!"

As Luke's expressions of happiness came out, Michael's did too. "Luke!" He exclaimed boisterously, "That's fantastic!" 

Luke nodded, as ze continued zir story, "But... I sorta need someone to take pictures of all the clothes I'll be selling-"

"Yes."

"What?"

"I'll do it."

"Michael," Luke's voice trailed off as ze looked down to focus on the grass ze was absentmindedly ripping out of the ground. Obviously one of the reasons Luke brought this up was because ze wanted Michael to do the photography for zir, but ze didn't expect Michael to agree so quickly. This wasn't just a fun litte thing to Luke, this was important for zir and ze couldn't have Michael taking it so lightly; this could get in the way of Michael's school work, so if he didn't have time, or if he just wasn’t genuinely interested, Luke didn't want him to agree. 

"You just spent a week avoiding my existence," Luke reminded him, trying as much as possible to not make that sound harsh, "Please don't agree if-"

"Lukey," Michael comfortingly placed his hand on Luke's shoulder. Not breaking eye contact once, Michael explained, "I wasn't avoiding you because I was angry, and I would never do anything to hurt you. You're important to me, Luke, I promise. I wouldn't agree to this if I knew I couldn't do it, but I can, and I want to."

With all of the emotions Luke felt rushing around inside, the only thing ze could do was give a simple nod to accept. Luke had never met someone so caring like this for zir besides Calum. And while it was refreshing, it was also quite stressing.


	6. Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!!! if you're reading, i love you :) im going to (try and hopefully) update more often!! we're like halfway through now i think so yeaaaaah hahaha. thank you for reading, i hope you enjoy!

Luke stumbled into zir dorm room around one in the morning; later than expected, and ze would probably regret it in the morning when ze had to wake up at seven, but that was barely on zir mind at the moment. The only thing on zir mind was the past few hours spent with Michael. 

Luke was still smiling as ze set zir purse down and kicked off zir shoes. It wasn't until Luke was digging through the pile of probably dirty clothes on the floor, trying to find pajamas, that Calum turned over in bed and sat up. When Luke noticed the boy yawning as he rubbed his eyes, Luke muttered a curse to zirself, then asking, "Did I wake you?" 

"Not really," Calum mumbled, "I was only half asleep. Where were you?"

A sigh escaped Luke's lips as ze stripped zirself from the mint dress ze had on, and changed into a shirt that might've been Calum's, and zir favorite comfy shorts. Luke knew Calum was going to question zir; Luke going out, especially late and especially without Calum wasn't a regular thing. 

Luke then giggled when ze tripped over the messy floor before falling into bed. "I was just out getting some drinks."

"God, Luke, you're drunk aren't you?"

"Please! If there's anyone who knows how I get when I'm drunk, its you. You know I'm not drunk."

"Okay, but you're tipsy."

"Okay, but you're not my mother!" Luke shot back with a huff. Yes, ze appreciated that Calum looked out for zir, but sometimes he could get too over-protective. And after the great night Luke had, ze didn't want Calum giving zir the third degree. 

"No, I'm not," Calum muttered harshly, "I actually care about you."

"Wow." 

That was by far the most hurtful comment Calum has ever made and could ever make- and he knew that. Mentioning Luke's family felt like being stabbed repeatedly in an already open wound. 

"I'm sorry," Calum sighed at himself, following up his apology with an explanation, "I didn't mean it like that, Luke, I swear. I just wanted to be sure you were in a safe environment tonight."

"I was," Luke grumbled as ze turned over in bed, trying to find a comfortable position. After minutes of silence pass, Luke decided that being angry at Calum wasn't worth it- ze knew Calum was really just being as caring as always. "I was with Michael." Luke smiled.

As Calum also got comfortable in his bed, he smirked, teasing Luke, "You and Clifford have been getting close, huh?"

Luke felt the butterflies in zir tummy start to flutter lightly again, "Hush, Cal. You know I don't date."

"I didn't say anything about dating, Lukey. I think you like him."

"I'm not saying I don't," Luke admitted, feeling zir face blush, "I'm just saying I don't date."

Calum didn't wanna push it- especially after the previous little spat with Luke, but he couldn't help himself. After all, meddling into Luke's life was his specialty. "C'mon, Lukey. Let yourself be happy for once."

Luke groaned, "I am happy, Calum. I'm happy with school, I'm happy with my friends and most days, I can be happy with myself."

"Okay, okay," Calum accepted what he would call Luke's stubborn side, giving one last explanation, "I think he's a good guy for you, and you know I'm never one to say something like that. But Michael is pretty cool, he's accepting of your gender, he really thinks you're beautiful no matter what... I get a good vibe from him. Give it some thought, okay? Goodnight."

Luke mumbled a goodnight back, voice muffled by the pillow ze was lying face down on. Ze could barely get to sleep, Calum's words immediately replaying in zir head.

**

When Michael's alarm clock went off the next morning, he almost regretted staying out late. However, he just couldn't. The night previous was filled with endless conversation while he and Luke drank, and then walking- or stumbling- back to the dorms with their arms around each other, laughing and singing songs they both adored. 

Michael was happy, to say the least. He was happy even though he had to drag himself out of bed and go to classes, he was happy even though he wasn't completely sure when he'd get to see Luke again, and despite the fact that he was still crushing hard, he was happy he didn't lose Luke and that they're friends. 

**

Just as suspected, it felt like the day went on forever for both Michael and Luke. But as soon as that last class was finished, Luke was ringing Michael, asking if he could start photographing the outfits for Luke's store today. Of course, Michael immediately agreed; he would never pass up an opportunity to see Luke. 

Luke hurried back to zir dorm, gathering all the different clothing items and packing them neatly in a small bag. The pair decided on going back to the woods area where they first took pictures together- not only was it special to Michael, but it was now special to Luke, too. So, just as before, they got into Michael's car and headed out.

For Luke and Michael, their moments weren't always filled with words. However, it was still like they were communicating; with looks, or quiet laughs, or through the music they put on. Every second spent together didn't have to be taken up with conversation, and the quiet times didn't have to be awkward either- and they both loved that. 

When the pair arrived to the forest, they hopped out of the car, and Michael began setting up his tripod and camera, as Luke began to put outfits together and get changed. Luke was giggling as ze attempted to put on clothes; making sure nothing was touching the ground, and also trying not to lose balance walking on the uneven grassy land in zir thick heels. Luke was thankful that it was the end of March now and there was no more snow to deal with. 

Luke decided to model zir dresses first. There was a short one that was black with white crosses, a pale pink one with lots of lace, and then zir favorite- the mint green hi-low dress. Michael took a few different shots with Luke in different poses; leaning against rocks, hands on zir hips, simple ones that looked candid. And still, upon request, without Luke's face in the photos. 

The fact that Luke didn't want zir face to be seen continued to make Michael curious, but he didn't yet think it was his place to question it. It didn't trouble Michael too deeply, but he was simply worried that Luke wasn't happy with all of zir looks and in Michael's opinion, ze should be; without any makeup, with only just a bit, or a full on dramatic look, Luke was stunning no matter what. 

After the dresses came many different shirts, a few skirts, and a couple pair of pants (including Luke's favorite- leggings.) By the end of the photoshoot, Michael was utterly amazed. As each of them began packing up their things, getting ready to head back to campus, Michael questioned in awe, "You made all of those things?"

Luke felt zir cheeks turning light pink, "Yeah," Ze said as ze neatly folded the shirts and placed them in the bag, "Not all this year though- some of the stuff is older." 

"Wow," Michael gently placed his camera bags in tripod in the trunk, before shutting it and absentmindedly staring at Luke, "You're so talented, Lukey." Talented was an understatement; Michael thought Luke was brilliant, fantastic, wonderful. It was astounding how ze could create such beautiful things.

"Oh, hush," Luke laughed it off, trying not to blush harder than ze already was, "Thank you, though." Luke quickly finished packing the rest of zir things, then getting in the car. Luke grinned over at Michael, repeating, "Really, thank you, Michael. For everything."

Michael reached over, placing his hand on Luke's and giving it a gentle squeeze along with flashing a comforting smile, "Anything for you, Luke."


	7. Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi hi hi!!! quick thank you to the lovely people who have left comments, i appreciate it a lot like rly it makes me all happy n warm n fuzzy inside :)))

Luke looked up at the dreary sky, glancing over at Calum as the two of them walked out of the post office on Wednesday afternoon. When the rain started sprinkling down, Luke huffed out a sigh as ze pulled zir leather jacket up over zir head. "Jesus, the one day I actually do something to my hair!"

Calum simply laughed lightly, shaking his head as they both began to walk faster, heading back towards the dorms. Luke had been spending a lot of time at the post office lately; zir small online boutique was a hit so far. For the past two weeks, every couple of days Luke was packaging up a new item and sending it off. 

Spring break had officially started two days previous, but didn't last long enough for anyone to actually bother going back home. Calum was sat around bored, so Luke dragged him along on today's post office adventure- until, when they were almost back to their building, Ashton called Calum and invited him out to dinner. 

"Do you mind if I go?" Calum mumbled to Luke, pulling the phone away from his face, "If you're going to be all alone tonight I won't go."

Luke waved Calum off, insisting he go; Luke liked that Calum had been spending a lot of time with someone else- not only did it give Luke a little time to zirself, to not feel as smothered, but ze also thought Calum and Ashton's friendship was cute. 

Calum jogged away as soon as Luke gave the okay, and then Luke was trailing alone. Ze didn't want to go back to the empty dorm to sit by zirself and do nothing, so despite the bit of rain, ze kept walking. 

Luke shuffled around the half empty campus for almost a half hour with no place in mind to go, until ze ended up in front of the building Michael's dorm was inside of. The pair hadn't seen each other since last week, Michael being busy with his assignments and Luke's time taken up with zir online store and of course assignments, too. 

Luke didn't know if Michael would be happy to see zir, but either way ze was walking inside and up to Michael's floor, then standing outside of the door slightly nervous after ze knocked. 

The music that was coming from inside Michael's room faded and then the door opened; Michael had an almost irritated expression on his face until he realized who was standing there waiting. "Lukey!" Immediately Michael was happier, and he let Luke into the room before closing the door again.

Michael returned to his spot on the bed where he was on his laptop. He glanced up at Luke to tell zir to sit anywhere, but then got distracted by the leather jacket adorning zir outfit, that was also something pretty unfamiliar to Michael. 

Luke was having a more masculine day; the normal skirts and pink sweaters or leggings ze would usually wear weren't accompanying zir body today, but instead it was black skinny jeans, a band tee and that jacket. 

"Is that my jacket?" Michael questioned after moments of staring.

Luke could feel zir face blush lightly as ze shrugged it off, setting it on the chair before cautiously sitting on the bed, next to Michael. Luke nodded, chuckling nervously, "I think so, you left it in our room a few weeks ago, I just kinda forgot to tell you about it."

"You little shit!" Michael joked, playfully tapping Luke on the arm, "I was wondering where I left that."

"Sorry."

"Don't be. Looks good on you."

Michael's kind words and flirty tone did not help Luke's blushing face, ze could just feel zirself getting warmer and more red. Luke pointed at the laptop screen sitting in front of the two of them, nonchalantly changing the subject, "Working on something for school?"

A stressed sigh escaped Michael's lips, "Yeah, but I'm almost finished. I think I'm still doing good but none of my work has been nearly as great as the photos I took of you." 

Michael wasn't exactly trying to compliment Luke that time, it just sort of always came out that way. 

Luke smiled, gaining a little sense of an ego, but still only teasing when ze said, "I am just the greatest, aren't I?" 

Michael laughed lightly, but when he agrees, he definitely is a bit serious. 

The two then sat in silence for a few minutes, the only sound being the clicks and taps on Michael's laptop as he continues to finish up what he's working on. However, not saying anything made Luke feel awkward, because ze knew the only reason ze wasn't saying anything was because ze was anxious. 

The more and more time Luke spent with Michael, the more nervous he made zir. Luke knew that zir feelings for Michael were deepening, and ze couldn't help that, but ze didn't like the fact that it was making zir feel so unsettled around a person who was comfortable, kind and caring- and also not as nervous.

The first thing that came to Luke's mind to conversate about was zir store. "Everything on my website is doing great," Ze said, pride in zir voice, "Thank you again for helping me."

"Is it?" Michael questioned, though it wasn't a shock to him at all. He glanced over at Luke before typing in the site to bring it up on his laptop. A pleased smile grew on Michael's face as he seen that almost everything listed had a "sold out" banner next to it. "That's fantastic, Luke. I'm really proud of you."

Luke felt warm with joy hearing those words. Ze watched as Michael scanned over the website, clicking on the pictures and gazing at them. Luke figured he was just trying to examine how he did with the photos, until Michael commented, "You look so stunning in all of these."

Luke opened zir mouth to say something back, until Michael followed up with a, "But..."

"But what?" Luke immediately questioned, panic in zir tone. Luke had looked over the pictures nearly 500 times and ze was sure everything looked good- but did they really not? Was something off about them? Was it zir that looked bad?

"But," Michael sighed, "I've just always wondered why you never want your face in the photos. I mean, I know it's probably not my place to question it- and of course you don't have to tell me, I just... You know I think you're gorgeous, so." Michael shrugged, staring over at Luke.

Luke's panic about the pictures subsided, but now ze was consumed with thoughts of the answer to the question- which, ze knew of course. Luke hadn't like zir face in pictures for years now; selfies were never zir thing, if it was a group photo ze always wanted cropped or blurred out- and ze had a reason that dug back to zir early teenage years.

"I...Okay," Luke exhaled as ze looked down, fumbling with zir fingers; was ze really going to tell this story- be this open with Michael? Could ze get through it without crying? 

Those were things ze didn't know, but found out as ze went on, "When I was sixteen, I finally started to wear make up. Calum's sister took me out to Sephora and we bought tons of things, it was probably the best day of my teenage life." 

The small smile Luke had on zir face of the memory quickly began to fade away, "I wasn't fully ready to wear a lot of makeup in front of my family yet, so I mostly just played around with it in my room. One night, late, my oldest brother came in while I was sitting in front of my mirror playing around with different looks and he-" The last word to come out of Luke's mouth came out squeaky- zir voice was beginning to shake as ze fought back tears. 

Right away Michael felt bad for even bringing it up, and he put his arm around Luke, holding zir tightly as he cooed, "Shh, it's okay. I'm so sorry, Lukey, I shouldn't have asked."

"No," Luke sniffled, bringing a hand up to wipe away the few tears that had fallen down zir cheeks, "It's alright, Mike. It's just, uhm- he... He said to me, "you know you'll never actually look like a girl, right?"" The way Luke quoted it sounded just as harsh as when it was said to zir.

Michael couldn't help but pull Luke into a hug. Seeing how fragile and hurt ze looked killed Michael, and somewhere inside of him he felt pure anger for the asshole that made Luke feel this way. 

"I don't know why it really bothers me so much," Luke continued as ze sobbed into Michael's shoulder, "I know I'm not a girl, but I am feminine- that's just who I am, you know?" 

As Luke pulled out of the hug ze wiped more tears, trying to steady zir breathing as ze finished the explanation, "So a while ago I figured, if I don't have my face in the picture, people won't know my gender, or lack thereof. With my body and the clothes I wear, it can usually go either way."

Luke ended zir story with a sigh and a shrug, and Michael was frowning, not yet knowing what to say first. He had a million thoughts running around his mind, feeling hurt for Luke, feeling sympathetic, feeling anger...

"I'm sorry, Luke." Was the first thing that left Michael's mouth. He continued slowly as his thoughts settled together, "I can't ever really know how you're feeling, and I'm not even sure I know the right words to say, but... I can tell you no matter what you look like, you're extraordinary. You're pretty, you're handsome, sometimes you're a mix of both. I always thought you were attractive, ever since the first time I saw you," Michael felt himself blush lightly when he admitted that out loud, "But nobody, nobody ever should be so harsh to you. You don't deserve that, you're a talented, smart, brave and kind human being. I can't imagine having a family like that, but if I did... Honestly, I would find family in someone else. You have Calum, his sister, you have me and I think even Ashton is pretty fond of you from how much I mention you," Michael chuckled, "But you don't need people to treat you how your brother treated you."

Luke wanted to cry again, overwhelmed and overjoyed at all of Michael's powerful words, but ze managed to hold back. In that moment, ze felt so safe, so comforted, accepted and wanted. Luke thought if ze could feel like that forever, ze would be so much more happier in life. Moments without speaking passed as Luke took in everything Michael said, before Luke opened zir mouth, blurting out, "Michael... Will you go on a date with me?"


	8. Seven

With spring break among them, having barely anything to keep them busy, Michael and Luke planned the date for only two days later. Michael had said yes the minute Luke asked, though nothing was fully confirmed until the night after when the two were talking on the phone in the middle of the night.

Michael was trying to keep quiet as he flirted on the phone with Luke, "You can pick where we go if you want to, cutie." He giggled, as did Luke as ze attempted to come up with a date idea that wasn't overused and simply plain. Luke was mumbling back a lot of "umm's" and "hmm's."

"I could pick, too, if you want," Michael added after a few moments of Luke being unresponsive. That started them up chuckling again, and Michael continued to babble on about where they should go and questioning if his ideas were good. 

They didn't actually decide on anything specific until Ashton groaned as he rolled over in bed, chucking a pillow across the room to hit Michael while sleepily shouting, "Jesus, will the two of you settle on something already so I can quit listening to Mr. Giggles over here and get some sleep?"

Michael knew he shouldn't have laughed at Ashton but being completely happy, almost everything was funny to him. He laughed as Ashton yelled out the idea, "There's a cafe down on fifth street that's having a slam poetry night tomorrow. You lovebirds can go listen to some poems, drink coffee and eat a fucking scone or whatever. Now, go. To. Sleep."

Michael calmed as soon as he heard the idea, and after mumbling a mostly meaningless apology to Ashton, he whispered into the phone, "Did you hear his idea? Does that sound good?"

Luke was lying in zir bed staring up at the ceiling, a dopey smile on zir face. Luke nodded until ze realized Michael couldn't see, and then answered, "Yeah, Mikey. That'd be great. I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow. Goodnight, Lukey."

**

It had already been an hour since Luke began the whole getting ready process, and ze still wasn't ready, even though it was nearing 5:30pm and Michael would be there any minute. Luke had changed zir outfit four times before settling on a simple grey top and a maroon colored skirt. Now, ze was trying to fix zir make up, yet again; as always, ze was stuck on doing that little wing with the eyeliner. 

Luke was wiping off zir eye make up when there was finally a knock on the door. Luke sighed to zirself as ze stared into the mirror, strategically re-drawing the wing near zir eye once more as ze hollered out, "Be right there, Michael!"

Michael chuckled on the other side of the door, and waited patiently. But when minutes passed and Luke was still inside, Michael tapped on the door once more and questioned, 

"Are you alright?"

Michael could hear Luke's sigh along with zir footsteps before ze finally swung the door open, mumbled a quick, "You can come in," And then returned to zir position in front of the mirror. "I'm sorry," Ze added, as ze slowly began to apply eyeliner to zir other eye, "Make up issues."

Too busy staring at Luke up and down in amazement, Michael couldn't even get a response to come out of his mouth. Sure, he'd seen Luke in these kinds of clothes and makeup before, but this time it felt different. This time, he was watching Luke as ze finished up the final touches of getting ready. And Michael knew this wasn't specifically for him- it was never for anybody else when Luke dressed up or wore makeup, ze did it because ze liked it- however, ze was doing this because they were going on a date tonight, and that made Michael happy.

Luke slowly wiped the corner of zir eyes with zir fingers before deciding the look was good enough, and then glancing up at Michael, smiling. "I'm sorry," Ze apologized again, then sitting on the edge of zir bed, quickly putting on zir signature wedged boots before standing up again and saying, "I'm ready, let's go!"

**

The cafe was quiet, and that was something that made Michael slightly uncomfortable. He understood that yes, it had to be quiet, because there were people standing up front reciting poetry and everyone had keep hushed so they could hear the poets, but to him the quietness was awkward. The only sounds besides the voices of whoever was speaking, were the rattles of the coffee machines, and the people who snapped to applaud the poets, instead of clapping. 

However, he wouldn't complain; he was content enough, because he was with Luke. The two of them sat at a table, next to each other, Michael drinking an iced coffee whilst Luke drank a fruity flavored iced tea. When Michael rested a hand on Luke's thigh, the two smiled at each other for a moment, Luke blushing lightly, before their attention turned back to the poets. 

Twenty minutes pass and Michael is starting to wonder if Luke is feeling as uneasy as he is. When he would glance at Luke, ze would be messing with zir hair, running zir fingers through it, or staring up at the posters on the wall, or just resting zir chin on the palm of zir hand with a blank expression, eyes focused to the front of the room. 

Michael didn't imagine it being like this. Normally, he could get into listening to people read to him. He was an artsy person; he enjoyed the different types of art, especially literature, however to him, the setting they were in was just distasteful- especially because this was supposed to be a date. When he imagined it, the two of them were laughing and having fun; talking, joking, maybe even holding hands- and none of that was happening right now.

Luke was never one to complain, but ze definitely did not hesitate to agree when Michael finally leaned over and whispered, "This is kind of... Boring, isn't it?"

Luke let out a relief filled sigh and nodded, chuckling lightly when ze responded, "I thought it was just me- I didn't want to say anything."

Michael nodded in agreement, also feeling relief that he wasn't alone in his thoughts, "Let's get out of here?" He suggested, and it took no time for Luke to stand up, beginning to shuffle away.

When the two are outside, they just begin to walk down the street, and Michael's glad he can finally talk- and loud. They both laugh and agree on how the setting in there was quite awful, and Michael makes a comment about how he's going to kick Ashton's ass for the horrible idea, and Luke approves of that. 

They walk about a block down, before they stop and realize they both don't really know what to do next. However, when Michael spots a record store across the street, he takes Luke's hand and pulls zir along, exclaiming, "I love record stores, come on!"

When they get inside there's an old rock song playing and Michael feels more than content. Luke's happy, too, not only just because they're out of that cafe but because ze feels like they're potentially doing something fun now.

The two scan the shelves full of records, as Michael begins to explain, "My mum and dad got me big into different types of music when I was younger. Mum loves her record player, she'd be so happy if I brought her back new stuff to listen to!" 

Luke was smiling as ze listened to Michael's little story. Ze could tell the way Michael talked about his parents that it made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside. As Michael pulled records out of their compartment to read the tracklists on them, Luke questioned, "You're close with your family, huh?"

"Oh, yeah!" Michael answered without a second thought, "I'm an only child, so growing up it was always just the three of us. My parents are like my best friends, we've always gotten along so great, and-" Michael glanced over to noticed Luke's falling expression, and regret immediately started bubbling in the pit of his stomach.

"I'm sorry," Michael spluttered, "I didn't mean to brag, Luke, I just-"

"No I know," Luke looked down at zir feet, sighing before giving a shrug and making eye contact with Michael again, "I think it's great that you guys can be so close, it's... Cool, really." Luke didn't want to mention that ze was extremely envious, though. 

"My parents would love you," Michael added with a comforting smile, placing a hand on Luke's shoulder, "Come on, I'm gonna buy this record and then we can get out of here, okay?"

The next place the pair ended up in was a bakery another few blocks down. Luke suggested it when ze noticed the building, and Michael was always down for any kind of desserts so there was no hesitation to agree. Michael bought himself a fancy designed vanilla cupcake, and Luke a slice of red velvet cake. The two sat near the window, and both moaned when they took a bite of their foods.

"I can't believe I've never had anything from here before," Luke commented, after swallowing zir first bite, "This stuff is amazing, we need to come here more often."  
Michael nodded in agreement while he took another bite of his cupcake. 

The date then continues to get better for a while. Michael mentions how his grades are continuing to improve, but how he's nervous for the last semester, because it will be more busy and work-filled. Luke agrees, and talks about how ze is worried about keeping up with the shop, and zir schooling. Michael, of course, offers to help in any way that he can.

As the two are finishing up their treats, Michael gets distracted by a group of boys that are sitting at a table a few rows behind Luke. Luke doesn't notice at first, because ze is going on about how Calum gets to present another painting at one last art show before they all go home for the summer. However, when Luke realizes Michael is barely paying attention, ze turns to look behind zir, and realizes the boys snickering and whispering to each other. 

"Michael," Luke says blankly when ze turns around again, "Just leave it."

Michael signs when he snaps his attention back to Luke. There's a bit of anger and annoyance in his expression when he mutters, "They're fucking- What, staring at you and- As if you're a joke?" Michael couldn't even think of the last time he was this mad.

"People stare at me all the time," Luke said calmly with a shrug, as it were normal- or even okay. Michael found that ridiculous.

Michael leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms, glaring at the group of teens and then returning glances to Luke. Luke continued to explain, "It's something I've learned to get used to. It's not everyday you see someone that looks like a man in makeup and skirts."

"That's not fair though!" Michael responded, as if Luke didn't already know that. "You're not a man, and even if you were, who the fuck cares what you wear?"

"Society." 

"Fuck society."

"It's getting late, Mikey." 

Luke felt a whirlwind of different emotions about Michael sticking up for zir. Though it wasn't directly to the boys- and Luke didn't doubt it could get to that point if they didn't leave- it was still eye-opening. The only other person that ever stood up for Luke was Calum, of course. It was kind of refreshing to see someone else getting worked up over the stares and snickers Luke often got, however ze also found it slightly problematic. Luke quickly began to worry that maybe Michael would get tired of the awkward glances and judgmental laughs that ze had simply normalized. 

The short car ride back to campus was mostly quiet. Luke only finally broke the silence when Michael walked zir back to zir dorm. After Michael pulled Luke in for a quick hug, Luke offered, "Do you want to come in for a bit? Calum's probably back now but he wouldn't mind."

Michael shook his head, shoving his hands in his pockets, "That's okay, Lukey. I'll see you soon though, yeah?"

As Luke slowly nodded and Michael began to walk away, the anxiety in the pit of Luke's stomach bubbled even more. Luke then immediately walked into zir dorm, sighing loudly at Calum who was sat on his bed, scrolling through his phone.

"This is all your fault!" Luke huffed, flopping down on zir bed, face buried in the pillows.

"The date's already over?" Calum questioned. 

Luke lifted zir head for a moment, to dramatically exclaim, "Yes, the date's already over! The date's over, I'm sure any potential relationship with Michael is over, and my life... Is over."


	9. Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im double updating, cause its been too long! :) thx for stickin with me, feedback is always appreciated :D

Just a few days after the date, spring break was over and classes were back in session, making it easier for Luke to continue avoiding Michael. After the date, Luke didn't make a big effort to talk to Michael; partly because ze was nervous and scared, and partly because ze thought it had to be over. Luke kept creating scenarios in zir mind of Michael telling zir, 'the date was great but we should stay just friends.' So whenever Michael would text Luke, Luke would give short answers back; if Michael called, Luke would make up an excuse saying that ze couldn't answer. Of course, Luke knew ze would have to face Michael sometime, but ze didn't want to right now. 

However, despite the fact that Michael was the last person Luke wanted to talk to, Michael was the first person on Luke's mind. As Luke sat in class, ze could barely concentrate as the memory of the date just replayed over and over again in zir mind- the thought of Michael standing up for zir was the most prominent. And what was even worse, was that the current thoughts Luke was having also made zir think of past disasters- especially zir first, and only relationship, which was something Luke wished ze could forget. 

Luke met up with Calum after class was over in a small art studio that he used in one of the buildings, to help him pick out a painting to present at the art show. Luke didn't speak as ze slowly walked around the room, admiring the different paintings on the different canvases, as Calum explained what they were and the meanings behind them. 

Luke was still having trouble focusing on anything else besides what was going on in zir mind, however it was easy to pick the painting Luke thought was the best. "Go with the one of the girl tied up by her own hair," Luke mumbled as ze pointed to the artwork. 

Calum happily accepted Luke's answer, mentioning how that painting was his favorite too and then began to explain the little story behind it in further detail, before glancing over at Luke and realizing ze looked barely interested. Calum then let out a sigh and pulled over two chairs, telling Luke to sit. 

"Alright, explain to me what happened on the date, because you haven't told me anything about it yet besides it was my fault?"

Luke's arms were crossed over zir chest as ze sat in the chair opposite Calum. Ze hesitated zir answer, shrugging, "It was your fault, you're the one who convinced me to go on the date."

"No," Calum retorted slowly, "Maybe I helped, but really Lukey, your feelings for Michael convinced you to go on the date. You asked him, remember?"

"Yeah, and I shouldn't have!" Luke shot back with a huff, "It went fucking terrible, Calum, this is why I don't date."

"Did he say something about your appearance?" 

Luke furrowed his brows in confusion, "No... Why?"

"Did anyone say something about your appearance?"

Luke sighed, frustrated with the multiple questions and also annoyed that Calum could guess that something like that happened. Luke repeated, "Why?"

"Because I know you, Luke," Calum chuckled, satisfied that he was right, "You've been wearing only masculine clothes since the day after the date. You never go this long without something even a little feminine unless you get self conscious again."

Luke then finally broke down and explained the entire night with Michael from start to finish, emphasizing the story about the group that was laughing at zir, and the way Michael got worked up about it. As Luke finished the explanation, ze shook zir head disappointedly, "I don't even know why I care so much."

"Because you like him," Calum answered simply, "And he's liked you for a while now, Luke. His feelings aren't going to go away that easy." Luke responded with a shrug, and Calum continued as he comfortingly placed a hand on Luke's thigh, "Please don't let your worries hold you back again. You're doing so well with everything; school, your store. Please just talk to Michael."

**

When Luke got ready for Calum's art show that evening, ze finally felt comfortable after putting on a plaid dress and doing zir make up. Calum was happy to see Luke in zir favorite type of clothes again, and offered reassurance and encouraging compliments to help Luke stay comfortable. 

As soon as the place filled up and people started admiring the different works, Calum's was the most popular painting. Everybody was fascinated by it, talking about it and questioning it. Luke was stood in the corner of the room, happily watching as Calum talked about his painting, explaining the meaning behind it and mentioning his other works. 

Luke was too busy absentmindedly staring to even notice that Michael had entered the room, but when Luke finally glanced over and the two made eye contact, Luke's stomach was doing flips again as zir nerves took over.

And though Luke didn't know it, Michael wasn't exactly calm either. Every time he would get a text back from Luke that was a short, quick response he wondered if he should stop trying. After the date that night, he laid in bed and stared at the ceiling, mentally cursing himself because he was afraid it was his fault that it didn't go great. 

Then, when Calum showed up at Michael's dorm, inviting him to the art show and blatantly stating, "Luke will be there," Michael questioned if it was a good idea to even go. 

However, there was a part of him that hoped it was Luke's idea; maybe Luke wanted him to come, wanted to talk in person but was too afraid to ask so possibly ze sent Calum to do it. 

Michael knew that wasn't the case, though, when the two spotted each other and Luke's face went completely white and lacked expression. 

The two were both hesitant as they stared at each other. Michael scratched the nape of his neck, slowly beginning to walk towards Luke. 

Luke replayed Calum's little speech about talking to Michael again in zir head, as ze also started to approach Michael. When the two met in the middle of the room, Michael sighed and Luke shrugged, nodding zir head towards the door, "Wanna go outside to talk?"


	10. Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two chapters + the epilogue after this!! :)

"I'm sorry for not really talking to you much after the date," Luke apologized with a sigh after ze and Michael found a bench outside to sit. Luke's body was tensed up with nerves, hoping for a good outcome of the conversation they were about to have. 

"It's okay," Michael accepted with a shrug, "I didn't want to push it though. I don't want to scare you off."

Luke's eyes narrowed at that statement, a look of complete confusion on zir face, "No, I don't want to scare you off."

Michael gave back the same puzzled expression as he let out a nervous chuckle, "Why would you scare me off?"

Luke let out another sigh, unresponsive. Ze glanced at Michael, shrugging and Michael could quickly tell by Luke's sheepish body language and the way ze wouldn't hold eye contact anymore that Luke had another story- a bad experience. 

"Lukey," Michael spoke softly, reaching out his hand for Luke to hold. Luke stared at Michael's pale palm before placing zir hand in his, squeezing gently. One of the best things about Michael was that he could make anyone- even Luke- feel comfortable. 

"Everybody leaves," Luke murmured with a shaky breath, "It's like I'm on edge all the time waiting for you to find something- anything- that's going to make you go, 'this is it, I can't handle zir anymore.'"

"Don't you think if I was gonna find something to dislike, I would have found it already?"

Luke shook zir head, letting go of Michael's hand to nervously run zir fingers through zir hair. Luke shifted in zir seat, attempting to fix the tension in zir body; however, it wasn't going away. "It took my ex six months with me until he was fed up," Luke finally began to explain, "That's how he phrased it too, by the way- 'fed up'- he said he was fed up with me dressing like a girl, fed up with how other people treated me. He said that he couldn't deal with it anymore," Luke rolled zir eyes with an annoyed chuckle, "As if it was his problem to deal with... So, whenever those guys at the bakery last week noticed me- and you noticed how they reacted to me, I just thought you were going to not be able to handle it."

"I understand, Luke," Michael responded wholeheartedly, pausing to lift Luke's chin, turning zir head so the two could make eye contact, "I really do, but you've got to understand, too that not everybody is like that. I am not like that... I wanted to kick those guys asses, and I would have if it would make you happy. If it's going to upset you, though, I won't say anything. I just want to keep you smiling."

Luke couldn't help but crack a small smile at that comment, zir tiny dimple sinking into zir cheek. "People like me don't get lucky enough to have someone like you."

"Funny," Michael smirked, "I've been thinking the same thing since we first met." 

Luke rolled zir eyes with a genuine giggle, before thunder suddenly clapped in the sky, making zir squeal and jump, which caused Michael to laugh. Luke immediately hopped up after the second loud boom that followed, reaching out for Michael's hand to lead the two back inside.

However, when Michael stood up and took Luke's hand, he pulled zir back towards him. "Wait," Michael whispered. Their bodies were close, and Michael was staring up at the sky; Luke glanced up, too, eyes focused on the darkness that was mostly clouds, and barely any stars. 

"What are we waiting for?"

As soon as Luke questioned it, the rain started trickling down. Michael said, "This." And then wasted no time before softly gripping the back of Luke's neck with a hand, pulling them closer and closer until their lips finally met. Luke could've sworn ze felt fireworks erupt in zir body when the two were kissing. It was gentle, slow, they could feel each other's warm breath in their mouths and Luke's hands were on Michael's hips and for the both of them, it was over way too soon but before they knew it they were almost drenched. 

But when the kiss broke they were both happy; staring at each other with dopey, lustful eyes. 

"Come on, let's get back inside."

** 

The next few days were busy for both Michael and Luke, but the two still made enough time for each other, even if it was just through texts or talking on the phone. It was officially the last semester of their school year, meaning they both had a lot to get done for their classes- things like final projects and tests- before they could pack up and go back home for the summer.

Michael stayed in his dorm for most of the week, on his laptop, hunting through all the pictures he had taken in the past year in attempts to come up with something good enough for his final project. He knew it had to be something big, exciting, and most importantly: meaningful. 

The only thing that came to mind when Michael thought of that was, of course, Luke. Luke had been a prominent thought in Michael's mind ever since the two first met at that party right before winter break. From the moment Michael's eyes noticed Luke, he just knew that Luke had to be an extravagant, wonderful person. 

Michael let out a happy sigh, quickly closing his laptop before shoving it in his bag, grabbing his camera, then heading to the other side of campus. 

**

Luke was hand sewing a patch onto a jean jacket when the unexpected knock on the door made zir jump, which then caused zir to squeal when ze stabbed zirself in the finger with the needle. Luke exhaled a frustrated groan, mumbling to Calum, "Get the door."

Luke held a tissue on zir bleeding finger as Calum lazily got up, shuffling to the door. When he opened it, he immediately had a smug smile on his face, making eye contact with Michael as he told Luke, "It's the boyfriend."

Luke finally glanced up, seeing Michael in the doorway and then blushed at Calum's use of the term boyfriend. Luke mouthed an apology to Michael, then gesturing for him to come inside.

"Boyfriend, huh?" Michael chuckled with a smirk as he stepped inside, closing the door behind him, "Is that how I'm known around here?"

Luke's pink cheeks deepened to a red shade, trying to ignore the question. Their title was something they hadn't talked about yet; neither Luke nor Michael knew what they officially were- dating, in a relationship, still mutually pining for each other? They had know idea, though they both knew either of them weren't seeing or talking to anyone else- they were exclusive with each other. Calum though just loved to tease Luke, and now Michael, too.

"You made me bleed," Luke stated as ze held up zir finger.

Michael squinted his eyes in attempts to see the small wound, and though he saw nothing, he frowned, and unapologetically said, "You poor thing. I'm sorry, Lukey." 

Luke giggled before ze finally questioned, "What are you doing here?"

Michael bit his lip as his eyes scanned over all the fabrics, clothes, and sewing items that were scattered around on the floor where Luke was sitting, "I was going to ask if we could go take pictures..." Michael's voice trailed off; really, he didn't have any specific idea for the pictures, yet. Mostly, he just wanted to see Luke again. "I don't know how I didn't think that you were going to be busy, too. I'm an idiot."

Luke rolled zir eyes, flashing a smile up at Michael, "You're a cute idiot." 

"The two of you are sickening," Calum muttered jokingly, causing all three of them to laugh. 

Luke gave a shrug as ze picked up the jean jacket ze was working on again, giving another attempt to sew on the patches, offering, "You can stay if you want. It'll get boring watching me put clothes together all night, I'm sure. But you can stay."

Michael smiled, then plopping down on the floor across from Luke and the piles of all zir stuff, mumbling, "I'd love to."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes, i did write a cliche, cheesy kissing in the rain scene lmao
> 
> feedback is always appreciated! :)


	11. Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello hello!! this story should be finished by the end of this week :D thank you so much for reading & commenting, i love you all :)

Michael yawned as he slowly rubbed his eyes open, feeling slightly confused when he realized the familiar room he was in, wasn't his own. He quickly sat up on the floor he was previously sleeping on, turning around to see Luke, still sat in the same position ze was the night previous, surrounded by the clothes and sewing utensils. 

Luke smiled at Michael, "Sleep well?"

Michael ran his fingers through his messy hair, his voice hoarse and sleepy when he replied, "Your floor is just about as comfortable as the bed in my dorm room, so," He shrugged with a small laugh, then asking, "Did you sleep at all?"

"I took a nap around four a.m," Luke answered nonchalantly, "I finished pretty much everything here though so it was worth not sleeping, I guess."

Michael stretched and yawned again, before lazily picking up some of the items of clothing that were lying around and admiring them. Michael adored all of the different types of clothes Luke had made; the dresses, skirts, colorful leggings and of course that bad ass jean jacket with all the patches on it that Luke definitely worked the hardest on. Michael couldn't decide if he wanted to wear it, or if he wanted to see Luke in it- probably both.

As Michael examined the different materials and pieces, he'd remembered one of the first times he and Luke had ever really talked; when Luke came out to Michael, and explained zir dreams of opening a boutique and the kinds of clothes that would be featured in it. 

Luke was doing that cute thing that Michael loved, where zir head was titled as ze was smiling when Michael looked back up at zir again. That look made Michael also crack a smile when he announced, "I have an idea for my project!" Michael’s hands tapped around on the floor in search of his camera bag, before he found it and pulled his camera out, quickly turning it on and pointing it at Luke, saying, "Pretend like you're sewing."

Luke laughed, "What?"

"Come on Lukey don't give up on me now!" Michael joked.

Luke let out another light laugh, putting a hand up to the camera and staring at Michael, "Michael, you could do your project on a million other things, why would you want to do it about me?"

Michael was staring back at Luke as he set his camera down. He was never one to really blush, or be embarrassed by his feelings and emotions- but Michael was definitely blushing when he admits, "Because… You're my muse, Luke. You always have been, from the moment I saw you." Luke was blushing now, too, "Whenever I see you- doing anything at all- I just get so many ideas rushing around my head."

"I'm not that spectacular," Luke was being modest.

"You might think that, Lukey... But I don't. I really don't, and you know that."

**

After Michael packs up a bunch of Luke's different types of clothes, Luke expects Michael to drive them off to their favorite location for taking pictures- he doesn't. The first place they go they don't even drive to. Michael takes Luke out around campus, and snaps a few pictures of Luke just walking. Luke doesn't understand it, confused because "it's just a basic task," however, Michael explains that's how he wanted it to look. 

Michael makes Luke change into one of the many different outfits he'd picked out for zir, and continues taking pictures. Michael handed Luke's bag to zir, and instructed, "Look like you're going to class." 

Luke couldn't hold back zir giggles at the concept- Michael was taking pictures that were going to look like they were candid, when they were in fact most definitely posed. Luke wouldn't point that out though- ze wouldn't question Michael, because even though Luke didn't understand what ze was doing, what the pictures were really all about, ze was confident in the fact that Michael knew. Michael always talked about how talented Luke was, but Luke knew that Michael was talented, also. 

The pair spent two hours taking different types of candid looking pictures of Luke around campus in varying outfits, before they ended up back at Luke's dorm again. The last few photos Michael captured were of Luke looking like ze was putting together outfits, designing and sewing. 

The two smiled contently at each other whenever Michael finally put away his camera after muttering, "Perfect." Luke said the same thing whenever Michael finished ordering pizza to be delivered for the two of them. 

"I had a fun day," Luke said as ze finished cleaning up the messy floor of zir dorm. 

Michael was sat on Luke's bed, only sort of paying attention to whatever he was scrolling through on his phone, but mostly admiring Luke and the way zir body moved so delicately. It was amazing to Michael how Luke was this tall, broad person whose body looked intimidating, but really along with zir shy, kind personality and the way ze did everything so soft and subtle made Luke seem dainty.

"I did too," Michael responded and when Luke joined him on the bed, Michael absentmindedly began to touch Luke, letting his fingers simply dance and trail along zir shirt covered back. It was soothing for the both of them, Luke let zir eyes fall shut as ze enjoyed the feeling of Michael's comforting touch. 

However, there was still one slightly worrying thought on Luke's mind that ze couldn't let go. Luke had been racking zir brain all day thinking of how to ask, how to bring it up... Until finally, ze blurts, "Michael, what are we?"

Michael's motions stopped, as he was taken aback by the sudden question- that he was also wondering about. Michael took a deep breath in before sighing and shrugging, then continuing to rub shapes on Luke's back. "We are whatever you want us to be, Lukey."

"I don't like the term boyfriend," Luke turned zir head to glance back and watch Michael's reaction- which ze was almost afraid of, "For me... Or girlfriend, either, I just don't think either of those fit."

"I figured," Michael nodded slowly, "You're about to think I'm really lame but... I looked up some names for you, y'know, things I could refer to you as."

Luke's eyes lit up- hell, zir whole face lit up with shocked excitement, "You looked it up?"

Surprisingly enough, Michael was blushing again as he nodded, "Yeah, a few weeks ago... Out of general curiosity... But also mostly because I was really hoping I would have to know more gender neutral terms for you." Michael paused and gave a shrug, "I mean, it's really up to you, what you want me to call you. But I really liked the term datemate."

Luke smiled even wider, before ze quickly leaned over to press a quick, chaste kiss on Michael's lips, then saying, "Michael... I would love to be your datemate."


	12. Eleven

The last week of classes- which was actually just a bunch of testing and final projects- passed so quickly that it was hard to remember what even went on. It was a lot of cramming, staying up late and too many coffee runs to even count, but Michael and Luke both enjoyed it as much as they could, because they were doing these things together most of the time. Ever since the two became official, it was hard to separate them. 

At the beginning of the week, everybody said goodbye to Ashton. He was the lucky one that finished everything early, and could finally go back home. Calum was also finished with all of his finals and paintings that had to be done, but of course wouldn't go home yet, because he wouldn't leave without Luke. 

By Thursday, Luke's finals wrapped up and ze shipped off the few last items sold from zir store, but lied about that to Calum so that ze could stay on campus until Michael would be done the next day. 

That made Michael happy, not only because it was sweet, and really cute, but also because whenever Michael got done presenting his final project to his teacher- and getting a positive reaction- he rushed right over to Luke's dorm, excited to finally show it to zir.

When Luke opened the door to Michael, he gave Luke a quick, chaste kiss on the lips, then smiling at zir and mumbling a greeting to Calum when he walked in. Michael quickly set up his laptop, hooking it up to the TV, and took in a deep breath as he brought up the powerpoint of pictures.

"For this class, we weren't really given a specific topic to do our projects on," Michael explained to both Luke and Calum, who were sat on Calum's bed, both impatiently waiting. 

Luke wasn't nervous; ze expected to be, but ze was actually just intrigued to see what Michael had come up with. "So when I presented this to my teacher just now, I told her: This is about how most people see things as usually so black and white- one or the other- and how it doesn't have to always be that way. There is an in between for everything." 

Michael glanced at Luke with a blushy face and shy smile before he began to go through the photos. They were of Luke, of course; mostly the pictures they had taken the week previous, but some older snapshots- some of Michael's favorites- had snuck in there as well. All of the pictures were black and white, and didn't include Luke's face. Half of the photos were of Luke wearing more masculine type clothes, like Michael's leather jacket and Luke's favorite black skinny jeans and t-shirts paired with flannels. The other half of the photos were of Luke in zir favorite type of clothing- long flowy dresses, light pink crop tops with skater skirts, the heels that Luke wore at least three times a week.

The last picture, though, was in full color. And it was of Luke, sitting on the floor of zir dorm, sewing needle in one hand and a half put together shirt in the other. You could see that Luke was wearing a colorful crop top, along with the jean jacket ze had finally finished making and Luke was looking into the camera with a bright, genuine smile on zir face. 

In that moment, it looked like Luke couldn't have been happier. 

When Michael closed the powerpoint, he smiled at Luke and Calum. Calum gave a little applause, and pulled Luke in for a hug, which Michael joined in on. Luke couldn't stop blushing when Calum explained how proud he was of Luke, for having a picture of zir face for the first time in years. Michael said a humble 'thank you' whenever Calum also commented on how wonderful Michael's project was. 

It was a big moment for all of them, though mostly for Luke. And while Calum and Michael could express to Luke how proud they were of zir, ze was too modest to admit it, but ze did agree- Luke was finally proud of zirself, too. 

**

When nighttime came around, Luke and Michael found themselves in Michael's dorm room eating chinese take out and packing Michael's things so they could all leave the next day. It made Luke happy to hear how excited Michael was to go home. Michael made sure that it wasn't making Luke uncomfortable that Michael was talking about his family. 

"It's not something that I can relate to," Luke explained as ze helped fold shirts and pants and stick them into suitcases, "But it's nice that you're so close with your family, it's admirable." 

"I know I'm really lucky," Michael stated honestly, "They're the best parents I could ask for. I think it's easy to get along with them though because I'm an only child. They never put pressure on me or had any expectations. They were always supportive of me, no matter what." 

Luke's voice was faint, "No matter what, huh?"

Michael nodded as he chewed on a piece of the piece of fortune cookie he had just stuck in his mouth, then explaining further, "When I came out to them, it was no big deal... I wish it could be that way for everyone."

Luke nodded in agreement, and silence filled the room for a few minutes before Michael then offered, "You know, Lukey, you could always come stay with me in the summer."

Luke glanced up at Michael while ze reached over for the half full container of noodles, "I wouldn't want to bother you too much, Michael. That's your family time."

"You deserve family time, too."

Luke blushed lightly, "Well, I'll be at Calum's house a lot. That's where I go when I can't stand being at home any longer."

Michael nervously bit his lip as he then continued to shove the last bit of clothes into his suitcase; he didn't want to push his offers on Luke, and make zir uncomfortable, but there was a part of Michael that was genuinely concerned about how Luke would feel whenever ze was home. Michael knew that it wasn't a place Luke liked to be- which was why ze always escaped to Calum's house. But Michael wanted his home to be a safe place for Luke, too.

"My parents would love you," Michael said, staring over at Luke, waiting for eye contact, "My mum's been trying to sew just anything simple for years, and I love her but she's, well, not the best at it. She could really use some help." As Luke made eye contact with Michael, a small smile formed on zir face, "And my dad has really good music taste, he could talk to you about that stuff for hours, I'm sure. And they would love you because, you're mine, Lukey. They've each told me, when I talked to them on the phone about you, that they're excited to meet you."

Michael ended his little speech to Luke with a comforting smile, and Luke immediately pulled him into a tight hug. "I can never thank you enough, Michael," Luke whispered. 

Michael's response was a passionate kiss, with his arms wrapped around Luke's waist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> double updating! epilogue right after this :)


	13. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg i cant believe im finally posting the last part of this!! i love this fic with all my heart & im so happy to see everyone else who loves it too! :) 
> 
> i'd like to start writing something else sometime soon, i'm open to any ideas so feel free to send me some over on tumblr! pansexualmikey.tumblr.com :)

two months later;

Luke emerges from the dining room of the Clifford household with a floral printed blouse in zir hands, holding it up to Michael who is sitting on the couch in front of the TV, which is playing an old episode of Pokemon. It doesn't take Michael long to notice Luke, and then smile at the piece of clothing ze is holding up.

"She finally finished it!" Luke exclaims, and a few seconds later, Michael's mum, Karen walks out and puts an arm around Luke's waist to hug zir gently. 

"It looks awesome, mum," Michael comments, attention mostly focused on Luke, who is blushing slightly. 

"Lukey was such a big help," Karen compliments before giving a loving kiss to Luke's cheek, then taking the shirt and shuffling away, off to show her completed project to her husband. 

Luke then joins Michael on the couch, wrapping an arm around his torso and burying zir head in the crook of his neck. "I've had such an amazing summer," Luke reminisces quietly and Michael agrees with a hum. The two shared basically the entire summer together; they went camping with Michael's parents, traveled the city with Calum and Ashton, spent nights in, or by the bonfire in Michael's backyard. They had an overall amazing time, doing everything and anything, mostly because they were doing it together. It was safe to say the two were falling in love, if they haven't already. 

Though it didn't come as a big surprise to Michael, it did to Luke, whenever ze met Michael's parents and they were immediately accepting. They didn't really talk about Luke's gender much, except when Michael was explaining Luke's pronouns, and even then, they had nothing negative to say about it- which was the complete opposite reaction Luke got from zir own family when ze told them. 

It was so nice for Luke to connect with a family in such a deep way; sure, ze had been hanging around with Calum's family, who were lovely, for years, but it was nice to have another small group of people be so kind and understanding- especially people that were important to zir.

Luke and Karen got along really quickly- probably because Michael had mentioned Luke's sewing and designing abilities right away. And it wasn't too hard for Luke to connect with Michael's father, either; the pair bonded not only over music, but also on the camping trip because still, years later, Michael was absolute shit at putting up a tent, but Luke was, surprisingly enough, a pro at it. 

"I'm glad you had a good time," Michael murmurs before placing a soft kiss onto Luke's head.

"I love it here. I love anywhere I'm with you."

The small smile that was plastered on Michael's face gets bigger when he agrees, "Me too." He sighs when he then pauses, hesitating to speak the thoughts that had been on his mind a lot recently, as summer begins to come to a close.

"Lukey, I was thinking..." Michael choked out, nervously struggling to make eye contact, "Whenever we go back to school, we should live together. There's tons of little apartment buildings near campus and, I don't know," Michael gives a shrug and tries to stop himself from blushing, "I think it would be nice to live with you. We spent so much time together this summer it's kind of hard to imagine now how I could get up in the morning and not see your beautiful face right away."

Luke giggled at Michael's babbling, along with the sweet compliment. And though some of the first thoughts that came to Luke's mind were, 'why would you ever want to live with me, what if my quirks start to annoy you' and other little negative noise, ze pushed those thoughts aside as much as ze could. Luke had been trying to get better at accepting, and believing in the positive things that were said to zir. 

"I don't know how I'll break it to Calum," Luke responded with a light-hearted laugh. Michael pulled Luke in for a tight hug, leaving a quick kiss on zir lips when he pulled away. 

"You'll find a way... We could even do it together," Michael suggests and Luke lazily agrees with a nod.

The two return to their gentle cuddles and silence, just enjoying each others company until Luke decides to speak up. A constant thought Luke had on zir mind, nearly the whole   
summer, ze finally settled on the fact that ze wanted to say it, no matter what the outcome would be. 

Luke was cautious when ze muttered out Michael's name, Michael then turning to face Luke again- which gave zir butterflies; ze adored that Michael would always give zir his full attention. 

"I think... I kind of love you. Very much."

Luke could've sworn ze had never seen Michael's face light up so bright more than it did in that moment. Until, of course, his expression was even better when he said, "I love you right back."


End file.
